New Art

Untitled oil pastel - it's small, I think 5x7.

It's a learning process...

The little H man again has amazed me.

We daily have a conversation that goes something along these lines:

Me: H, you are kind of stinky... are you poopy?
H: No.
Me: H... are you poopy?
H: NO!
Me: What if we go change you?
H: No.
Me: What if we read stories after?
H: Mmm, okay.
Me: Okay, let's go upstairs to change you.
H: No!

Something like that...

So, today we again had this conversation. I told him he could play for a few minutes before I changed him. During those few minutes we got onto the subject of body parts names. This entails me pointing at a body part on either his or my body and him guessing. When he doesn't know the name I tell him. He has all the major parts down, so I was trying to teach him eyelashes and eyebrows and fun stuff like that. But part way through the game I gave his bottom a pat and asked him what it was - he responded without pausing, "Poop." When I started laughing he laughed too, and said, "Bum, stinky bum!"

All I have to say is that I'm glad I at least got him to admit that he had a stinky diaper.

Also, on the subject of H, he's working on the art of delaying and distractions. After changing his diaper before his nap, he kept suggesting that "H downstairs, libery book" (He wanted to go downstairs to continue our reading of his new library books.) I completely respect his love of literature, but he isn't going to sway me away from putting his droopy-eyed little body down for his nap.

ps. He isn't even two yet and he knows his colors. We spend tons of time coloring and talking about colors. We're also working on counting and the alphabet, but those are not coming along as quickly. His talking so much though. I pretty much have my whole day narrated in short two to four word sentences, with much of it being repeated like a broken record.

Puzzling times call for time with puzzles!

Found a use for the dinning room table! We mostly use the kitchen table or the living room for eating, so this works out for a fun way to make use of the dinning room. It's all the center of the apartment so when ever we walk past it we have to stop and try to put in a piece... you can see we've just started it. I remember doing this growing up, especially around the holidays, so it's fun to bring that memory home. Yeah for puzzles!

Weather

Last weekend it was so warm that I was wearing short and t-shirts. Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday it was warm, seventies, and beautifully blustery in a truly autumn-like fashion. Now it is COLD! Why is there never a gradual transition from season to season? It was horribly cold for a spell, then unbelievably warm and back to cold again. It's frustrating. I love just about everything about Chicago, but I am sure that if I ever leave it will be because of the weather.

How things change...

New Years is traditionally the time of reflection, but I feel as though my birthday month is more of my own reflective time. Especially as I reflect on my birthday party last night, I can't help but contrast it with last year's celebration. While vastly different in numerous ways, each event was in its way wonderful.

Last year I felt very alone and forgotten. I was rescued from spending my birthday alone by a wonderfully nice neighbor. That celebration kicked off a series of events that led to my eventual meeting of many of the people I now treasure.

This year I was surrounded by many old and new friends, so much so that I didn't have time to really really talk to anyone. That was a new weird feeling for me. I was also surprised by several people who I thought wouldn't be coming. (Tricky people. :) I was also very touched by cards and unexpected gifts from people.

In this impersonal world it seems so easy to become isolated; I feel very fortunate to have such sincere and lovely friends. This has just been a marvelous year of change.

So, I'm grown up, apparently.

Last week, one evening, I was sitting in the laundry mat reading when the distinct realization that I was an adult hit me. I think especially in my very early twenties, even though I had a job and an apartment, I had the expectation that my real adult life was still to come. I now believe that I am living it. This is exciting and scary all at the same time. Exciting because I am happy with much of what I have accomplished and scary because my life's wish list is still so long.

My birthday is approaching, bringing me a year closer to thirty. It is amazing how thirty doesn't actually seem old anymore, as it did when I was a young child. But it still holds significance. I can't help but feel that by thirty I want to have certain things figured out. For example, I'd like to be married and I would like to have my art be making me enough money to quit my job. I think maybe I would like to own a home as well. That last one just occurred me as I was writing.

In contrast with all of this serious thinking, I am thankful my life is balanced with the joy of being young in a truly amazing world. A little over a week ago, my boyfriend and I participated in a city wide scavenger hunt. We had to bring a camera and photograph ourselves at each of the check points. We had to figure out clues to find those check points and we could only use our feet or public transportation to get around. It happened to be the Saturday Chicago was hit was severe rain storms and we spent the entire three hours we were out and about soaked. It was a complete blast. I felt young and silly. If you want to see any of pictures let me know and I'll email them to you. Two of my favorite pictures are of when my boyfriend was trying to do a handstand in front of a sign of a president's name. The first one was taken in the pouring rain on the street, but we realized later Lincoln did not count for some reason, so the next one was taken in middle of a busy underground subway platform with the train we needed to get on in the background. We still managed to get on the train! Who says you can't have fun and be grown up?

Painting update

It seems that I paint in bursts. I used to stress about my weeks or sometimes months between painting, but the creative bursts are as excessive as the lack in between and I figure its all in balance in its own way.

Recently I finished as set of four small "fish eye" paintings that have been well received.

I call it "The Deep Blue See".

This led to another painting with the same color scheme, and of course featuring eyes.

Shortly after this time period I spent a Saturday watching the entire second season of Dexter. After 12 hours of this slightly disturbing show I was not able to sleep until producing a slightly disturbing painting. The unique things about this last painting is that I used my fingers and the tip of a marker (no longer part of the marker).

I am having trouble getting the pictures from my phone to my computer, but I hope to eventually have them online.

Two more paintings are in the works, but they still sort of count as part the "burst".

Busy being busy.

Sorry for the lack of updates. I have been busy with various summer activities - festivals and BBQs, oh and working tons.

I am also sure that some of you have heard that I have been planning a trip home in September. For various reasons, mostly because of the cost of flying right now, I have decided to stay in Chicago. I will try to make the effort to see as many people as possible over Christmas break to make up for missing my summer visit.

After the show...

Last night went really well. I took a bunch of pictures that I hope to post soon. Thanks for all of your support!

Art Update!

Today, the 23rd, is my art opening! I had intended on leaving more updates and filling you in more on the prep work, but my Internet has been sabotaging my desire. I am just now back online. Either way, I am going to be having my first non-academic art show in the next 24 hours! I have my camera and will take tons of pictures.

Everything else is going well. H is as adorable as ever.

Oh, I am just so excited!!!

Foggy Fireworks.

Yesterday my friend S was aghast that I would not be seeing fireworks this 4th. I didn't really understand her reaction or my own nonchalance to fireworks. And then it hit me. I grew up in an area where fog was a legitimate reason for either not having fireworks or for having very bad fireworks. I did not grew up thinking fireworks were the biggest part of the day. Also, my experience with Chicago fireworks have not been overly pleasant. When it isn't too much work and too crowded, I do enjoy fireworks. I think I'll go see them later this summer, at Navy Pier.

Dreaming

I am dreaming of a day when I have nothing planned and nothing to do.

Strange Acceptance

I have been contemplating the upcoming family reunion greatly. While I greatly value the reunion and the family that is still in my homestate, I am not sure (with the increased prices of flights) if a long weekend in Maine is worth the expense. My employers are very likely to take an entire week off in late August/early September. I have decided to take this week to travel more extensively throughout the state. Missing the reunion pains me greatly, but being able to spend more than an afternoon with the family is worth the pains.

Also, with my parents moving it has been difficult emotionally for me. Even though I haven't lived at home in six years it has been my secure point, my emotional base. The understanding of "home" has come under questioning. Thankfully I am coming to the understanding that where ever it is that I am, that is home. My family, they are where they are living as well as trapped forever in my heart.

Blues and B.B. King

As Chicago is the Blues capital, it is only fitting that I am finally falling in love with the Blues. Last night I went to the Blues Fest to actually listen to the music. The Fest concluded with a phenomenal performance by B.B. King. I am still slightly in awe that was able to see him live. I truly do love this city.

You can't tell, but this is B.B. King. My friends got better pictures, but still, this is B.B. King!!!

This is the crowd crossing Michigan Avenue from the Blues Fest. Michigan Avenue was open to traffic and so was the street we were standing it. It was kind of amazing to be part of this crowd. Normally during the larger fests some of these streets are blocked off so that the masses of people can safely get to the trains, but they had crossing guards instead. I must say they had a very tough job (much of the crowd was drunk or high by this point) and they did very well. Yeah, Chicago!

Painting - cheaper than a therapist.

I feel as though I have things to say, but not the words to articulate them. That is probably why I am painting tonight instead of hanging out with friends. I am filled with emotions, good and bad, that I feel are just bottled up inside of me. I just started a new painting and the first layer is down, giving shape to the idea being expressed, and it is astounding how I already feel a better mental clarity. As much as I try to be logical, so much of my thoughts are purely based on emotion and I am really thankful for having been given the ability to release and organize these thoughts through paintings. People have often commented on my paintings as having an emotion. People who try to describe my paintings almost always articulate how I was feeling as the time better than I could ever hope.

Busy times

May seems to have vanishes without me realizing it or updating you all. Spring somehow disappeared during these past few weeks as well, as we have gone from winter coldness to summer hotness.

Since we have last spoken I have hosted a Bridal Shower, a Memorial Day Cookout, a jewelry party, discovered Chicago's amazing blues scene, become friends with an amazing band and seen the musical Avenue Q for a second time. I think that's it. If this is a sign of my summer schedule I am a little afraid. I am having a great time, but it is exhausting.

I have also set a date for my library art show opening, July 23. It is a Wednesday. I would have preferred a Friday, but the library closes early on Fridays and Saturdays and people are not likely to come to afternoon events. I am excited though. I have finished (or will tonight) three paintings that I have been working on recently and have a few ideas for more. My new painting/easel set up is working out beautifully.

While this is not as eloquent as some recent posts, this will have to do. I will try to get some pictures of my recent paintings posted soon.

Windy City and Weird Noises

This morning I observed that my bike's motor was rather sluggish, so I decided to ramp up my horsepower for my commute home. I was exhausted by the half way point of my route. Part of this way I was because I was attempting to keep up with a much faster biker. This, along with a decent wind coming at me made for a rather good workout. Then I approached the one daunting part of my commute - the bridge. It's really not that substantial, but being a biker in the Midwest I have adapted well to the flat roads. My goal is to be able to bike this without slowing my pace. Today as I was trailing the faster biker, gearing up to give myself a good speedy start before hitting the incline when the wind hit me. Towards the top of the bridge the wind was coming at me with so much force that I found that it took me all of my might to just keep the bike moving forward without even considering my lack of speed. I am taking the bus tomorrow to give my legs a day off. They deserve it.

This morning was also a continuation of an interesting phenomenon. My roommate has now joined me in marveling at our upstairs neighbors unique habits. Originally I thought I was having very odd dreams. Then I thought I was having strange morning illusions. Today was the first time I was fulling awake when hearing the noises. It seems that our upstairs friend enjoys a very early morning routine consisting of dropping heavy objects over our bedrooms. His usual time frame is roughly between 4 and 5 in the morning. Nothing our friends have suggested seems to match up with what could be causing the noise. It is likely that my roommate and I will leave a polite, yet questioning note on his door, as being awaken that early, 3 or more days a week (weekends included), is not something we consider normal for apartment living. It surely does make for an interesting conversation starter. My roommate has also observed this neighbor's rather loud exit and entry each day before and after work. Combined with the "mystery" incense in the hallway, our speculations are all over the map. At least life is interesting.

Painting again

I am delighted with my currently painting set up. Granted it is still in disarray from my move, but my easel is up, paint brushes ready and paint easy to access. I have begun to work again on paintings that I had set aside last fall. It is tremendously fun. I walk into my bedroom and the first thing I see is my painting on my easel. Sometimes I walk in and am not even sure what it was that I was intending to do, but feel the intense need to touch up the painting. Some days I may not paint for very long, but I have always been a burst of energy type painter. I'll paint intensely for an hour and then quit. I also went to the paint store today. It will be nice to have black paint again.

Here is a very bad quality photo of my latest in progress painting. It is far from finished. I love how, aside from the original eye shape, it resembles nothing of my original idea for the painting. I have allowed the painting to move me instead of the other way around. I don't want to force an idea on an image.

Biting - One of the occupational hazards of being a nanny.

He bit me! I was helping him, rubbing on the part of his gums where his newest teeth are coming in (he was smiling even) when he moved his head and chomped down on my finger. Sadly, this isn't the first time he has bitten the hand that feeds him, but this is the first time he broke through my skin and actually caused pain. When I sternly told him “no” he laughed. This is the same child who moments before was plastering me with loving kisses. Seriously.

Too much of a good thing.

One of the first things my roommate and I noticed about our new apartment was that the entry way smelled like incense. This appealed to us for many reasons, the main one being that we were absolutely sick of the smell of our previous apartment's hallways. The occupants of one of the apartments below us were chain smokers who smoked inside. The smell of their smoke always seemed to collect in our third floor hallways and somehow seep into our apartment. We used candles and various scents that kept the smell out. (We did noticed, when we went back to finish cleaning, that without our candles the apartment was beginning to smell. I am not sure how our previous landlord will fair with getting someone to rent out that place.

Okay, back to the first part of the story. I noticed this evening that the incense from our neighbors was working its way into our apartment. Not that I minded. It was simply a mental observation. However, when I briefly left the apartment to mail a letter, I was bombarded with a very intense smell of incense in the hallways. When my roommate came in, she brought another wave of incense with her from the hallways and now the smell is so strong I am able to taste it. While none of this is an actual complaint, I would just like to point out that I strongly believe that too much of a good thing may not actually be a good thing.

Rare find

The permanence of an object being lost seems to be in direct correlation to its importance in your life. Today was a rare exception.

Yesterday evening I mistakenly left my wallet in the cab as I was returning home from my friend's art show opening. I was unaware of my doing this until this morning when I was packing my purse for work. I have been absentminded about a great many things and have lost a great many things, but I don't believe I have ever lost an entire wallet. Thankfully I only carry around the essentials - credit cards, bank card and driver's licence. The cancellation of these items was an unpleasant alternative to my morning nap.=, but by noon I had come to the accept that my favorite wallet was gone and that I would have to actually get an Illinois licence. Then came the pleasant call from my bank informing me that they had a woman on the other line who had found my wallet. My lovely bank connected us and I was able to stop by my latest hero's apartment after work to pick up my wallet. Apparently she and her brother had found my wallet in the cab and wisely decided that turning it into the driver was not likely the best option. She fortunately lives in the same neighborhood so it was not difficult to stop by after work to reclaim my lost possession.

I feel incredibly grateful for how the events unfolded. Although not only am I thankful for the return of my wallet, but rather the discovery that some people are still honest - that discovery is the more valuable find of the day.

Newest Favorite Cupcake Ever

I know the title really isn't grammatically correct, but it is impossible to describe my latest chocolate love. As a "thank you" for their date night my employers brought me a cupcake from the bakery "A Taste of Heaven" and I think I am in love. I generally appreciate chocolate, but have often found cupcakes to not always be all that they could. My employers, intentionally or not, failed to give me any hint of why my cupcake was so special. Once home I prepared to partake in the treat, knowing in general the these sorts of things are best eaten right away. As I took it out of it's adorable little plastic carrying case, I noticed that when I licked a bit of the frosting off the edge that it tasted like chocolate. Mind you, not chocolate frosting, but like CHOCOLATE. This was interesting and delightful. Then I peeled away the paper wrapping and bit into the cupcake to discover another surprise, under the chocolate hood was a delightful buttery frosting that meshed perfectly with the moist cake and the sweet chocolate lid without ever overwhelming me with too much sweetness. True to their name, this cupcake was "A Taste of Heaven." What a pleasant way to end the day.

Pre-moving moving

This weekend my roommate and I spend much of our time packing and them moving car loads of stuff over to the new place. This is not my favorite thing, however my eagerness to be at the new apartment makes this process bearable. Next weekend is the big move, but we wanted to have all of the books, the breakables and the artwork over.

My roommate has assessed that we moved about a sixth of our apartment. We'll have help with all of the big stuff and then we'll be out of here. It'll be nice. I am ready for the place. Both R and I were talking about how the new apartment feels grown up. Not that our current place is terrible, it's just quaint and we're both done with being quaint.

Also, last night I went to my friend's art show opening and met the owner of the gallery. I hope to submit stuff for one other their shows in the near future.

Biking and Babies (and my upcoming move)

I am biking again. I love it. I currently have a cold so I have been taking the bus these past few days, but will be back at it soon. My new commute from my new apartment is wonderful because it has actual bike lanes. I am very excited about it. Although there is a bridge that has an incline... I have been spoiled with my current flat bus route.

H has been adorable. He is walking like crazy. We went to the library story hour and then to lunch with my nanny friends and their charges. At the restaurant he was great, watching the musician playing the guitar and flirting with the ladies around him. But whereas before when we went out he would pretty much stay attached to my leg, now he is off exploring. He tried to go into the kitchen there, as well as the bathrooms. It was quite adorable, but requires much more diligence than before.

Oh, side note: If you did not get my recent mass email about my new address and want to be updated please email me. I have a ton of email address without names attached so I don't know who they are exactly... I know, it's helpful. Or not. But anyhow, don't take offense, just email me. The big move is set for the 19th. We've cleaned the new place and will start moving small things and breakable items. My roommate's family is migrating up for the weekend and several of our guy friends from school have volunteered to help. The hard part is getting everything ready.

Appricating life.

This week one of my great Aunts died. I am sad to say that I did not know her well, however, I know her death has effected people who are dear to me. It is their loss and the close-to-home realization that life truly is short that has caused me to ponder the worth of what I am doing. I don't mean that my job and activities have no meaning, but that I am suddenly aware that on life's scale of importance, some of my highlights really are not that important. This week I kept opening this window to write about the happenings and everything just seemed less important in writing.

I also caught glimpses of a preview for a Barbara Walter's Special about living until you're 150. This maybe my youth talking, but I am not sure I want to live to be 150. I hope that by the time I am old (not sure what age is "old" as I get older I tend to thing of "old" as older) I will have lived my life fully and be ready to die. God willing I ever reach "old".

So, this week I am going to take pleasure in the little things God has given me. And my heart and prayers goes out to those who are hurting.

I have been on VACATION!!!!!!

Yeah, I have been on vacation. It's over now. I went to DC for Easter weekend and to Baltimore for a few days to see my sister and her family. My niece is adorable. I was also able to spend a few days here at home just relaxing and visiting some friends I haven't seen in a while. Though it's cold here and I am really tired of being cold.

Tomorrow is back to normal... for a while. Work should be normal, however I need to find a way to get the keys to my new apartment. My roommate will be gone all next week, so we'll start moving stuff the week after. However, the big move is scheduled for the 19th. It is coming up much faster than I expected. I feel like I'm going to blink my eyes and be 30, then 40 and so forth. It's a little scary.

Loving Chicago, literally.

"It was October and a harsh breeze blew her along under trees without leaves, past houses with cold corners, past caves of the wind that were the mouths of residential streets. From that time until April, Chicago is an indoor city, where entering by a door is like going into another world, for the cold of the lake is unfriendly and not like real northern cold – it serves only to accentuate the things that go on inside. There is no music outdoors, or love-making, and even in prosperous times the wealth that rolls by in limousines is less glamorous than embittering to those on the sidewalk. But in the houses there is a deep, warm quiet, or else an excited, singing noise, as if those within were inventing things like new dances. That is part of what people mean when they say they love Chicago."

From “First Blood” of the Basil and Josephine Stories by F. Scott Fitzgerald

The things you miss when I fail to post for a week...

Even though it has only been slightly over a week, it feels as though it has been four hundred weeks since my last post. This past St. Patrick's Day weekend was loads of fun, but very very busy. I finally got a glimpse of "green" river. Every St. Patrick's Day or the Saturday closest to it, the city of Chicago intentionally dumps chemicals (sorry, dye!) into the river to turn a section of it a bright emerald green. It's rather fun to view, but I laugh because the river is normally a muted icky green. I did not attend the parade this year, mostly because I went last year and thought it was over rated. I also had a fantastic time helping my friend celebrate her birthday.

Tonight I am preparing for my trip to DC/Baltimore. I will be spending Easter in DC. I am very excited to be able to attend my church there for Easter. I will also be able to catch up with a few friends I haven't seen in ages as well as one of the families with whom I previously worked. I will finish up the trip with my lovely sister and her family in Baltimore. It will be a nice break.

I will also have a few days off still once I return to Chicago. I am hoping to use those days to begin sorting through my stuff, in preparation for packing. As much moving to new places, I really, really hate packing and the moving process. Thankfully we have a month overlap with the two apartments and will have time to move at a less crazy pace.

Oh, and H is as adorable as ever. He's starting to walk with confidence. At times this is misguided confidence, in that he thinks he can walk over his toys without actually picking up his feet. His parents also bought him big boy shoes... which he refuses to wear.

Teeth and Taxes

Today when I was looking at H, he grinned up at me revealing his toothy grin and the realization that he truly is growing up hit me, once again. I know these six teeth have been there for a while now, but I was remembering his formerly gummy grin. I am not sure why I am so continually surprised by the fact that H is growing up. With many of my nanny jobs I have worked with the infants up to the point of having one or two teeth, but that age group has seemed to recycle itself in my various positions. I think part of the shock is that I am still here with H, after this point. While I have left all of my jobs for wonderful reasons, I feel strange about having made it past this point in the child's development. Strange and yet, honored. I can't help but feel as though the ax will drop and this happy situation will end. This feeling has nothing to do with my job, I am happy and I believe my employers are happy, but with the fact that around this point I am used to having my happiness rug pulled out from under me.

Side note: I finished my taxes. I feel so responsible... don't worry. This feeling probably wont last.

Great news!

Two great things happened yesterday.

First!
I had a meeting at one of the Chicago libraries. They have a section of their library leading into a conference room that they allow local artists to hang their works. The woman in charge liked my paintings and gave me the mid-July to mid-October slot! It's free, the library isn't involved aside from lending me the space, so if anything sells I get all of the profit. I also have to hang my own pieces and promote them, but I will be able to learn from my friend who has the mid-April t mid-July slot. I also think it is an excellent way for me to begin showing my art in a very low pressure situation. I am very excited.

Second!
Yesterday I received the news that my roommate and I were accepted for the apartment that we both really wanted. We'll be able to begin moving in April. We need to be out of our current apartment by the end of April, so I think it will be an "easy" move.

I will try to send out new address notices or email as soon as possible.

Almost a Professional Artist

I have finally finished my portfolio. The only thing I have left to finish before my meeting on Wednesday as the Artist's Statement. You might want to click on the above picture to get the intended effect.

Here is a sampling of what the pages inside the little black book look like. These are two of my more resent pieces. I have a few pieces that I might add still, but I have 14 pieces in here, one of those being my set of four cubes, so I feel that I have decent presentation of my work.

Thanks for all of your support! I will you know how the meeting goes....

Organized Chaos - Putting together my Professional Painting Portfolio

This the the in-progress layout of my portfolio. My fellow artist friend just stopped by and told me I should make some of the pictures bigger, so I will work on that.

It is amazing how little I know about computers and how much they are required in my profession. I had to figure out how to print these suckers, size them and all that fun stuff.

Most days I would prefer to paint, hang the finished pieces on my walls and call it a day. However if I aspire to make money doing this I have to show people these paintings, then I have to convince them to buy them. This is really not that much fun. Thankfully, as an artist, I enjoy the process of creating this little scrapbook (sorry, portfolio). It does make it easier to show people my work if I have it all wrapped up in this handy little black book. With the help of my artist friend I am getting more and more involved with the Chicago art scene. I really enjoy meeting other artists. Until I figure out what I should do next, this is certainly a great way to fill the time.

Trying something new...

My dear artist friend, we'll call her M, informed me recently about a non-instructional figure drawing session at a teashop. It will be a monthly thing, beginning this Friday. As neither of us have drawn from a live person recently, we are a bit nervous, but the power of two (e.i. of not doing something alone) has emboldened us to step out of comfort zones. For a small fee, you get to sit around a semi-clothed model with other artists and practice drawing. It sounds like all the fun of a drawing class without the pain of a teacher telling you that you are terrible or that so-and-so is the only one with the proper perspective.

M has also managed to give me the gentle push that I needed for me to consider putting my art work on display. She was kind enough to give me the tips I needed for putting together my portfolio. It all very crazy and yet exciting. I will try to keep you informed.

Hodge Podge of Thoughts (that I meant to post on Tuesday)

I have had this blogging window open on my computer screen all afternoon. This blank page has been waiting for my words. When I stepped away from the computer ideas of what to write came to my head, but the moment I sat down they float away. Here is what I was able to retain from my day's thoughts.

--H is taking steps. It's delightful to watch. Terrifying as well. Yesterday he figured out how to open the door to the bathroom and office. This action does not please me as well as his walking. He is also opening the cabinet doors in the kitchen. This last new talent is just plain annoying.

--My roommate and I went apartment hunting this past Saturday. We found an adorable apartment in my favorite Chicago neighborhood. It is slightly more expensive, but for the size and closeness to El, major important bus routes and neighborhood of my dreams, well worth it. It has three negatives: no A/C, no in-building laundry and no covered parking (roommate has a car). These are all things we were hoping to acquired with a new address. A/C can be bought, although it would be nice to have central air, window units are decent enough. My roommate said today that her car could live outside for another year. But we are both very uncertain about not having laundry in the building. I found reasonably priced portable washing machines online today. That might solve the problem. We figure if move and don't need it we could sell it to the people moving in after us. But still, is all of this worth a bigger apartment and a great location?

Today I was walking back to work for date night babysitting - I was freezing, but I was concentrating so hard on not slipping on the ice or stepping in a puddle that it wasn't until I was almost at work that realized I had warmed myself up with my walking. Anyhow, I am tired of this winter. I am tired of being cold. I want spring to arrive. I want pretty colors to be everywhere and I want to not have to bundle H up every time we go outside.

Grandparent Invasion Day

Today all four of H's grandparents arrived to stay until Monday. H's birthday party is being held on Sunday, although his birthday was last weekend. While it's nice to have more time to myself during the day, it feels very strange. I am not accustom to being able to leave the house during the day without H, nor am I used to doing laundry without carrying my twenty-two pound helper in the basket. Also, today as one of his grandmothers was feeding him his afternoon bottle, I realized that I'm delegating all the fun stuff. I don't think I realized how much I enjoyed having him look up at me while I give him his bottle or our cuddling during story time. It is nice though to be able to share the joy of watching H with people who adore him as much as I do, besides his parents.

Mini Road Trip / Ice Issues

This past weekend I went to St. Louis to visit friends. Four of us crammed ourselves into a car and drove down Friday night and came back Sunday afternoon. It was sort, but sweet. It was one of those trips that could have been stressful, but ended up being everything you needed.

I would also like to comment on the fact that people are lazy. I know shoveling snow is not the most fun winter activity, but people (ME!) don't have cars and have to walk places. I slipped on Friday coming home from the bus and tore a hole in my only pair of jeans without paint on them. And on my way to work this morning I slipped on the same spot, but not as badly because I was watching for the ice, but still couldn't pass this section of the sidewalk without falling. I intend to walk on the other side of the street tomorrow. The problem isn't the huge chunks of ice, it's the unsalted spots that are most dangerous. Either way, I am very annoyed with these people. My landlord is included in this because he thinks he only has to shovel the walkway that leads to the street and not the sidewalk parallel with the street. I am looking forward to spring more than you can imagine.

I probably shouldn't be amazed by this...

The little H man is about to turn one. He and I have been playmates for the past seven and half months and while he has grown in leaps in bounds (almost walking!), I look at him now as he is playing and still think of him as a darling little baby. Turning one seems to be the first big step to his becoming a toddler and I am not sure I am ready. One the other hand I watch as he plays with his older (17 and 15 months) girlfriends and look forward to him walking and talking along with them, but there is something so beautiful about children under a year.

One reason I love being a nanny.

Today as I was getting H's morning bottle ready he was leaning against the cabinets, "talking" to me, when he spied the bottle in my hand. His eyes widened as though it were a great shockingly delightful surprise. Looks like that get me through the lowest of days.

Also, H has successfully dropped his morning nap two days in a row. So far it has been a smooth transition. I don't mind the longer afternoon naps, that is for sure. I am not going to presume that the whole week will be like this, but it has been pleasant so far.

H is for Handsome Haircut

H got a hair cut this weekend. So now the "H" in little H man stands for handsome. H looked like an adorable baby when I left on Friday and now he looks like a handsome little tot. He is turning one soon and almost walking. It is amazing how it only takes a little hair cut to shock me into realizing that he is growing up.

H man strikes again.

This week the little H man has turned into a coughing snot factory and I am his human tissue. He has also decided napping isn't as much fun as "jump-in-the-crib-while-blowing-raspberries" time.

Frozen Grand Central at Improv Everywhere

I thought this concept was really interesting, well executed and worth sharing. Enjoy.

I was starting to feel better...

I have been sick these past few weeks. First the flu and then a drawn out cold that is now sniffling its goodbyes.

But now I feel a new kind of sick. It's a slight nausea in the bottom of my stomach that I haven't felt in ages. I blame this feeling mostly on my ex-boyfriend who introduced to me to the highs and lows of football. Thanks to him I am now a proud Patriots fan. I watched most of this season without prompting - figured out when the games were on and dedicated Sundays and Mondays to watching my boys. And actually ignoring my friends who, dear hearted as ever, didn't actually care about the games but were sweet in their support of my watching. I tried not to be cocky like those stupid Giants fans, because it's just not attractive. However... I was probably a little over confident. When your team, that you have watched for a whole wonderfully beautiful and interesting season, comes out to play at the most important game of the year, you expect great things. I feel kind of like I have been hit by a truck. My well intending ex sent this article that helped some, but mostly sunk in deeper the despair I have been feeling since the game ended. If a sports fanatic was blind sided by this loss, then just imagine how this poor little trusting newbie fan is feeling.

My employers were wonderful and left me a condolence card. They would understand how I feel, they're Cubs fans.

Go Patriots!!!

I am super excited about the Superbowl this year. I have worked hard to watch almost all of the games this season and even got a cool shirt to wear. I hope to leave a more excited post after the game, but I don't want to predict anything for fear that it won't happen.

It snowed... a lot.

Okay, so I think although the result of the storm was only about a foot of snow, the fact that it snowed for a day and a half continually at the same pace was pretty astounding. While at first the snow fall was pretty and enchanting, the continuation of it eventually just became monotonous and annoying.

The fun part of all of this is now trudging through badly (if at all) shoveled sidewalks and sinking our boots unsuspectingly into vast puddles of melted snow at the curves' edges as we attempt to cross streets. In such street in which cars are too busy "trying to drive safely" in the slushy streets to actually watch for wet booted pedestrians crossing the street (in the designated crosswalks). Oh, how I love winter.

Love and hate; the world of a child's smile.

It is quite lovely how little ones don't hold grudges. I may be not making the H man's lunch as quickly as he desires, but the moment the food laden spoon is being directed towards his mouth he is all smiles. Or the little H man will be at one moment protesting my changing of his diaper and furiously upset with me for not letting him kick his legs wildly - then with my tickling under his chin, he changes his frown to a smile and wraps his little arms around my neck as we head downstairs to play. The smile of a little one seems to shove away all shadows. Any frustration, tiredness and general unpleasantness cannot coexist in the world of a child's smile.

Back to the bike!

Today, after a two month hiatus, I went for a bike ride. My roommate and I rode to the lake, after first dropping of DVDs at Blockbuster and then a brief stop at the local bike shop. She needed a quick tune up for her brakes and I bought a hat that fits perfectly under my helmet. It was too warm for my mask, but too cold to not have my ears covered. Over all, it was about 12 miles and roughly 30 degrees outside. The wind was a bit cold at times, but we were dressed warmly.

I think it was worth the ride, here is why:



I wont be biking to work this week because my schedule is going to be nuts. I don't want to be biking home at 10 pm. However, it was wonderfully refreshing to be on my bike again. I am sure that once my work schedule is back to normal AND if is not snowing or slushy, then I'll be biking again. Oh, I love my bike.

Not as scheduled...

H and I did not make our daily field trips as previously planned. The weather has been at record lows with wind chill factors well below zero. I did not feel the need to subject the H man to such conditions. As a result we have been going slightly stir crazy. I have also been fighting off the onset of a cold. Loads of water and vitamins have helped so far, but my voice becomes scratchy when I talk too much.

With the help of my roommate, her car and a few shopping trips I finally feel like the apartment is being homey. We still would like to move when our lease is up, but it is nice to feel cozy now - especially since all I seem to be doing lately is hibernating. Another friend is closing her gift shop / gallery, so my roommate and I are buying a bunch of bookshelves and two chairs from the shop. I love the idea of having bookshelves everywhere with books and art. I like the my roommate and I seem to share a similar vision of our apartments decor.

Excitement

Today was bit more exciting than usual.

I heard this reported on NPR (it's my alarm) this morning and realized I would not be able to hit snooze. I work in this area and the hole in the ground kind of slowed down my commute to work. I'll be walking about six extra blocks in the very, very cold mornings and evenings to get to my bus stop until this is all cleaned up.

On the bright side, the little H man and I took a walk down to look at all the big trucks. I believe if he could talk he would have told me that this was our best field trip ever. He was audibly excited and squirming in my arms trying to see more things. If I turned away from the trucks he would whip his head around to get them into his view again. Just for the record, I did not train him to care about trucks and such boyish things, but it seems to be inbreed in his little head that these are truly things of great joy. We plan to continue these field trips daily until the road is fixed.

Baby, it's cold outside!

I managed, to my delight, to not leave the house at all yesterday. It was said to be below zero (or close to that) all day with a wind chill factor of a much lower temperature. So, I stayed in my pajamas, cleaned, watched a few movies and over all had a great relaxing day.

Today it is also very cold. Too cold to be waiting for a bus, so I stayed in this morning. I will migrate a few blocks east this afternoon to watch the Patriots game, but that is the extent of my traveling plans. This weekend has been the perfect weekend to follow a bout of the flu. I am sure I needed to be forced to rest to actually do it.

I am so glad I got a flu shot...

There is no need to go into great detail, but yesterday I left work around 3:30 with the flu. I got home just as the full misery of the situation hit me. Thankfully (I am not sure thankfully is really the right word here, but....) Thankfully my female boss was home (with the flu) and I was able to leave right away. I felt terrible leaving her, but I felt much more terrible later that afternoon and was very thankful to tucked away in my pjs in bed.

My roommate should win some sort of award. She was beyond helpful and sweet. It was almost like having a substitute mommy.

(Oh, and a side note: My cab driver on my way home from work was hilarious. I felt bad that I couldn't fully appreciate him because I was fighting off nausea. He said that before he was a cab driver he was a stand up comic. He kept me entertained the whole way.)

I think I am feeling somewhat normal this morning and will go to work around noon. I am far from 100 percent again, but I am so much better than yesterday that I feel a sort of rebirth. I am also really thakful it was only a 12 hour bug and not something much worse.

The ever adorable H man strikes again.

Today I watched the almost eleven month-old H man dismantle a carrot. For his afternoon snack I had given him a baby carrot that had been dipped in water and frozen. When I released this poor carrot from his drool soaked hands it had the consistency of a soft, slimy piece of rubber that was somehow, oddly, the color of a carrot. He doesn't have enough teeth to chew it, so he spent the time between inhaling his cheese and apple pieces gumming the carrot. As a nanny there are very few things that I find really gross and the texture of the carrot was getting close.

In general though, the H man is quite adorable. I am continuelly amazed at his ability to figure out that he must duck when pushing things around under the dining room table and how he is able to balance while clmbing on his toys. I am also equally amazed that no matter the number of times I say "no, thank you, let's not play/chew on the cords (phone, radio, lamp, etc)" he still continues to try to get to them. It's a good thing he makes me laugh, because there are some days when his cord fascination gets really frustrating.

Winter is only as boring as you make it.

Winter is the time when cabin fever sets in and people like me start developing a nasty little travel itch that never really is cured unless some sort of actual traveling is executed. Rather than my usual insanity (moving to D.C., Japan or Chicago are such examples), I embarked on a short weekend trip this past weekend and have a few other such weekend trips planned.

This past weekend involved me driving three hours to Michigan to spend Sunday with a friend who is working on a presidential campaign. I was able to watch the speech away from the crowds, next to where the national press was siting. I had no idea who I was mingling with, so I was not really impressed with any of them. I also found the whole process political process (well, what I was able to observe of it) to be kind of nonsensical and I feel less like voting now than I did before I went to Michigan. I was able to see a writer friend from D.C. who was following the campaign for the day. Oh, the biggest surprise was a unexpected meeting of a guy I knew when I nannied in Japan. It is such a small world.

My next upcoming trip is to St. Louis with three other friends to visit with my married friends who are forced to live there because of a his graduate school's location. As much as we love these two friends, the main draw to St. Louis is to see the play Avenue Q. I am beyond excited about seeing the play.

Bunny Moment

I saw a bunny today! It was hopping on the grass between the sidewalk and an apartment building on my block while I was on my way home from the bus stop. It made me momentarily forget how motion sick I was from my bus ride. I normally don't get car sick unless I face backwards, but today the bus was really warm and I was playing a game on my cellphone. Anyhow, I feel fine now.

So, I know, I know. . . a lot has happened since my last update, but I haven't been online much and when I have been I haven't felt creative.